Office Politics 101: The politics of romance

woman in our office is extremely active in a political party and has invited me to be involved.

Q: A woman in our office is extremely active in a political party and has invited me to be involved. I do like her — we’re both single — but I have quite different political views.  What should I do?

A: You seem to be open to a serious relationship with her and I presume you have been seeing each other socially to some extent.

We can often be rather private about our religious and political beliefs, for example, so she almost certainly considers you a friend as she has revealed this dimension of her personal life to you.

While she may simply be advancing the cause of her political party through this invitation, it is more likely she also sees this as a way to get to know you.

Given her apparent fervour, she is hoping you will similarly become supportive and grow to share her political views.

In some instance, political affiliations can be based on the appeal of a leader. She may be loyal to the leader of her party and would like you to become acquainted with him or her.

Political beliefs can generally be placed on a continuum from right to left. People on the right tend to be interested in individual rights and nurturing business interests, while those on the left often support efforts to expand the social safety net and may see government as a way to more actively address many of the ills of our society.

These brief definitions are admittedly highly simplistic but I would suggest you can probably place yourself on the right and her on the left (or the converse).

Good friends don’t necessarily have to share the same beliefs but should you become more intimate — perhaps leading to marriage — you may discover there will be an enduring tension.

Do you respect her views — and those of the party — she supports, or do you find them to be sufficiently abhorrent to cause you embarrassment and criticism from family and friends should you be seen attending meetings?

To use a popular expression, would you say her political beliefs are a “deal breaker” for you?  In other words, can you sense your views are so dissimilar as to create continuing conflict?

You should share your concerns with her at the earliest opportunity and either accept or decline her invitation based on how strongly you feel about the whole matter.

Although you could maintain a special friendship with her you should be aware that your differing views may result in stress that might threaten your capacity to become more serious

Submit your confidential questions relating to work and office life here.

Get local stories you won't find anywhere else right to your inbox.
Sign up here

Just Posted

Accident, downed power lines closes Highway 4 west of Port Alberni

Detour is available near Hector Road as BC Hydro crews work to restore power

Huu-ay-aht First Nations qualify for national wage subsidy

Limited partnership structure caused concern when CEWS was first introduced

ARTS AROUND: Giant Book Sale has new date, new location

Book sale will take place in November at Alberni Athletic Hall

A second wave of COVID-19 is probable, if history tells us anything

B.C.’s top doctor says that what health officials have learned this round will guide response in future

Yukon writer reads at virtual Alberni Valley Words on Fire

Joanna Lilley will make her appearance on May 27

An ongoing updated list of Alberni Valley events affected by COVID-19

Has your event been cancelled or postponed? Check here

Kelowna man charged with harming a hamster

The 20-year-old Kelowna man faces several animal cruelty charges

High tech fish transport system set up to ‘whoosh’ salmon past Big Bar landslide

Fish will spend roughly 20 seconds inside the system, moving at roughly 20 metres per second

Trudeau to seek 10 days of paid sick leave for Canadian workers, says talks are ongoing

Paid sick leave is key to keeping COVID-19 spread under control, prime minister says

Snowbirds jets will not be leaving Kamloops, just yet

The Snowbirds have been in Kamloops since May 17 when a plane crashed killing Capt. Jennifer Casey

COVID-19 checkpoints ‘up to them,’ Bonnie Henry says of remote B.C. villages

Support local tourism economy, but only if you’re invited in

CVRD testing Shawnigan water after complaints of metallic taste, odour

“This type of problem has come up a number of times in summers in the past”

Vancouver Island hasn’t seen a new homegrown case of COVID-19 in two weeks

Island’s low and steady transmission rate chalked up to several factors

Most Read